- Remember: people are not telepaths. They need words.
- When you are ‘honest’ about your feeling, remember you have two levels: transitory and deep/permanent emotions. (You might love someone deeply but be angry with them at this instant.) Remember the deep feelings and if you must tell the transitory, let the person know they are have to do with the moment. (‘I feeling anger right now because you threw out my brown blanket.’)
- As things unfold, keep people informed. If you say nothing, they think you don’t care about the outcome or are not making progress on the problem. This will cause them to become disappointed or angry at you. (And perhaps feel that they must be worthless as (supposed) lack of action indicates you don’t consider them worthy of time or respect.)
- Likewise, now it takes small effort to stay in touch, so if there are people who you want to keep as life time connections, take a few moments every once in a while to let them know you are still thinking about them.
- Don’t forget to thank people for what they do for you. (See Schindler’s List where he always sent the Nazi generals a basket of gifts whenever they gave him something.) [For example, if your aunt gave you money to buy a present for yourself, send her a thank you note.)
Basically, if you care about someone or want a good relationship with them, communicate with them a repeated intervals to let them know you are thinking about them.
Silence breeds fear and anger. [However, talking TOO much can cause disaster.]
PS. Now (at the start of your life) is a good time to take courses and read books on how to listen, talk, and negotiate. Small improvements in these skills can alter the end point of the path you are starting on.
